Posts Tagged ‘ulti’


IPL… u better watch both of them

April 17, 2009

another day to go and there we’ll have another great indian tamasha.. this time live from south africa… we are gonna have another HOT summer… cuz  i am sure that unlike last year there wont be any morale policing this time….
and I’ll be watching those juicy cheergals from all over world…  we have stringent morale policing which applies everywhere, from Sania Mirza’s Skirt to Akshay Kumar’s jeans.. last year, i remember in Mumbai Indian’s match cheerleadder were wearing full sleeves… may be our chief Minister/ Home Minister Suggested to please their High Command …  one thing i m gonna miss, is to watch those cheergals live(offcourse wid free ticket from my last employer)… its not only cheergals but also celebraties which popup in every match, heat up the things… watching a match is  a different experience… its like watching a bollywood masala movie… u get cocktail of all the emotions… Action, Adventure, Drama, Fantasy, Suspense, Thriller…Romance too…
definitely its more than juz a cricket… earlier all my (Girls who r) frnds used to hate watching 11 men running behind a dead sphere and not behind them…. but wid this shorter n quicker format of da game, they also got addicted to IPL (remember, IPL is not an abbreviation of I-Pill)…
                  i m stumped, i always thot they loved longer ones… newayz even superman can not understand  a woman… sometimes i feel that to promote secularism, we shud declare cricket as a religion… n “The” Sachin Tendulkar will be prophet… or may be Lalit Modi …coz he can spread the faith rather sell the faith better than him….

     neways back home we have another IPL (Indian Politician’s League) going live…which comes once in five years… we’ll see some imported (Italian) cheergals (actually Cheerladies) dancing on the stage (in fuller sleeves) for votes… the only man to hit centuries on both the pitches is Mr Sharad Pawar- our legitimate agriculture minister and BCCI president by intrest…
in our constituency, we are still searching for our MP Mr chi-chi (Govinda), from past five years he has become Mr India…. i still fill pity on those who voted for him… they dont know how to use their finger…. this time congress has changed their PARTNER and replaced him wid Sanjay Nirupam… many voters are asking….who is he?
             i think he also got short memory like gajini, and forgot that even big boss couldn’t bare him for more than a week…n all the prisoners from Big Boss gonna rally with him… even they want their piece of publicity… after who can identify them in public unless thay are tagged…  i’ve crossed my fingers… pls god.. we don wanna bare him for 5 years… even bejaan daruwaala can not predict in our constituency… as we have lots of migrants (including bangladesi’s) living under illegal roofs.. they are counting on him to legalised them… i think Pareto’s principle applies here too…

” more than 80% of ppl who vote, actually pay less than 20% of taxes
and less than 20% people who do not vote, actually gather 80% taxes ”

            so its we (excluding I, coz i used my finger carefully in every election), those 20% ppl are the real culprit.. more than politicians… i wish to see deadly lines of 3-4 hrs of waiting to vote juz as we see in Shirdi… wats wrong in that.. even that invisible power will laugh at you,  if u fail to vote for a visible power..

it is rightly said by VoteIndia
“Bad politicians are chosen by good people, who fail to vote.”

            ppl often complain whom to vote… nobody is good amongst them….
many of them has more criminal records than their academic records..
but if you vote u might elect a bad politician and if you don’t then, worse may get elected…. lets hope in this awake of bullets and bombs, Mumbai will vote for just, if not the best person…

The ballot is stronger than the bullet.
Abraham Lincoln


i m on liquid diet….

March 9, 2009

Date : 9th March(monday)
Time : 9.00 am
Venue : mah workstation

               yes thats true, from past 2 days i m on a strict liquid diet….its monday morning n had loads of applications to look after…but my brain is still marinated in yesterday’s antiquity …it was a frnds party.. party for winning in two league matches and losing in semis.. there were 11 players in the match and 20 in the party…funny equation.. kay karnar फुकट, तिथे प्रकट … .. ther wz loads of music n dance…. the last timestamp i remember was 10:10.. n i was with my 4th Large… that peg itself resetted the counter…. after that i din look back..neither in front too…i kept rocking n dancing all night.. not on da dance floor but in my mind…. my frnds say फुकट ते पौष्टिक… no doubt they have turned my belly into a 15L pressure cooker…..(Every pressure cooker has a whistle, which blows hot steam. Just FYI. No comments on my vessel.)

           as usual I was late for the train….the ultimate mixer, juicer and massager of people…… .but lucky enough to find a 4th seat.. now thats a new concept for ppl outside Mumbai…here in Mumbai u can dream of everything…and actually have your dreams come true… but if u want some space in train/bus /house, u have to struggle for it…in a very very hard way… juz like I did, to actually fit half of my bottom into space not even size of my palm.. now that’s called wise use of scarce resources….i managed to push my other half by next station, the trick is to slide a millimeter every time train gives a jerk, and not looking in da eyes of ur neighbour or may be while looking  at the ceiling fan, humming any old song like TUTUTU TUTUTAARA.. any song which will piss him off and force him to look into other direction…or else ur guilt will eat away you, the moment u see him staring at u… neways i m on wid my Application..brb


Date : unchanged
Time : 11.00 am
Venue : unchanged

               somehow have cleared my backlog of the weekend..managed to check on all of them… nah they aint any business application.. but yahoo, orkut, gtalk,4,5,6…….n… i chooose not to open them from home. not b’coz,I have any access policy at home, but then yeh sab Kachra ghar mein saaf karega toh office mein kya karega. in last couple of hrs i have bugged all my frnds simultaneously, till i remembered my conversation wid VJ…when he asked me abt my work, i said i m getting paid for doing nothing…the next suggestion he gave to blog out my fraustration, the way  he  is doing it after our grads..when i asked abt my problem wid lack of creativity..yeah thts true.. I AM NOT CREATIVE…but its not a manufacturing defect.. but its an IT effect… i don remember when i used all of the keyboard, it hardly matters even if its working or not.. as a developer u need to remember only ctrl+C and ctrl+V… and  sometimes ctrl+alt+del too, when ur program acts in weird way..neways i liked his suggestion (he was asking for some credit for it in this “ERA OF GLOBAL MELTDOWN AND CREDIT CRUNCH”. Have mercy my frnd, MAY GOD FORGIVE HIM, REST IN PEACE.).  it seems my blog will take away my frustration to the reader of it..(con)Science says, fraustration is neither created nor travels from one mind to another.. i wonder from where did it come in 1st place……so if u find it with u do write it back to me.. i have to kill another 3 hours post lunch… gotcha go.. now its lunch time…


dont P.T.O.